Harsh truths and other ramblings..

The reality that my life is and is going to continue to change has just sunk in:

In six months time, give or take a month, I will for the first time truly be living on my own. The rugrat is off to college.

I will have no further excuses for time management fails when it comes to my own college education.

My weight loss fail has reached epic proportions. I need to make the time to improve my general well being and help the child not to go down my weight issue path.

I am turning 40 this year. Am I ever going to get my shit together? How many decades do I need?

My doctor diagnosed me with severe depression and suggested I get medical assistance. I had an appointment for a psychiatrist this week but Blizzard 2015 got in the way. Must.Re-schedule.ASAP. I have a hate/love relationship with mood stabilizers meds. They work on me but I do not like how it makes me feel. It sometimes feels like part of me, that part that makes me ME disappears. Most would argue that it makes me a better version of myself and helps me function better as a whole.Meh.

Things I want this year:
My child to be happy and successful in her last year of HS and in college

Happy feelings/thoughts to find me and take residence within me

Be cleared for graduation by Spring 2016

Move to a new apartment and adjust to living on my own

Get certified in my job

Find a new job that I feel appreciated and gainfully compensated

Find love. A love that accepts me as I am and only wants the best for me

Travel for work, for fun. (Chicago is my first stop to this end this year)


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